Nutella IS a god - like an actual deity, a divine figure. If you think otherwise, you should probably think otherwise about how much you like your face the way it is.
If Kirsten is hungry, she will not acknowledge your existence unless she’s allowed to have some of your shrimp cocktail.
If you start talking about spiders to Kirsten, she will hit you. Hard. I did it once and now I don’t remember much about my life before high school…
Kirsten IS Brent Miller.
Kirsten will ALWAYS go hiking with you…
Kirsten will NEVER go hiking with you!
If she ever passes out from laughing too hard at a simple question (ex. “Do you have a curfew?”), simply resuscitate her by insulting High School Musical to her unconscious face.
Don’t ever touch her fucking rice.